Drivel and Whatnot

Invisible

2012-01-28T05:50:00.000-08:00

I came across this yesterday on Life in a Pink House. I think all moms (and step moms, and dads, step dads, caregivers, etc.) need this kind of assurance every now and then.

The Invisible Mother
attributed to Nicole Johnson 

It  all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the  way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and  ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on  the phone?'

Obviously  not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the  floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see  me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair  of hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you  open this??

Some  days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock  to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number  is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30,  please.'

Some days I'm a crystal ball; 'Where's my other sock?, Where's my phone?, What's for dinner?'

I  was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes  that studied history, music and literature -but now, they had  disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going,  she's going, she's gone!

One  night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a  friend from England . She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and  she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting  there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was  hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty  pathetic, when she turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and  said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of  Europe . I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her  inscription: 'With admiration for the greatness of what you are  building when no one sees.'

In  the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would  discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after  which I could pattern my work: 1) No one can say who built the great  cathedrals - we have no record of their names. 2) These builders gave  their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. 3) They made  great sacrifices and expected no credit. 4) The passion of their  building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A  story of legend in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the  cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny  bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are  you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be  covered by the roof, No one will ever see it And the workman replied,  'Because God sees.'

I  closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was  Almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you. I see the  sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.

No  act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake  you've baked, no Cub Scout meeting, no last minute errand is too small  for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but  you can't see right now what it will become.

I  keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one  of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished,  to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the  book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in  our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to  that degree.

When  I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's  bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the  morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for 3  hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd  built a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And  then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, he'd say, 'You're  gonna love it there...'

As  mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're  doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will  marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been  added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible mothers.

Someday

2012-01-27T06:09:00.000-08:00

(source, although I don't know the origin of the quote)

Wuurd. 2012.

2012-01-20T07:51:00.000-08:00

I was still having a heck of a time picking my word and had basically decided to give up when I noticed that Layla was having a link up party.

I thought that this would be good accountability for me if I put it out there for others to see. So I mustered up what brain power I could and finally came up with

(source)

It's funny, because that word was on my original list but I had completely forgotten about it.

Focusing on anything has always been hard for me. I get sidetracked easily and never end up finishing half of what I start out to do. I figure by actually focusing on well, focusing, it might help me to stay on whatever path I take this year.

(source)

One thing I've noticed about myself is that I suck at multitasking. I really can't focus on more than one thing at once. Well, at least not anything important. I can fold laundry and watch Real Housewives at the same time just fine.

(source)

I think I get nervous about focusing because I think I'll get bored or won't know what to focus on in life. Sounds stupid, doesn't it? But I think I try to fill my attention with a bunch of different things because, really, I don't know what the focus of my life should be right now. I'm avoiding thinking about it. Well, time to stop avoiding.

(source)

I hope this process won't be too painful, but in a sense, all growth requires a bit of growing pains, right? I want to look forward to this year as a year of growth. And possibly a year of discovery. And that can only be achieved if I really focus on what's going on.

“The Time Is Always Right To Do What Is Right.”

2012-01-16T08:23:00.000-08:00

"Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal."

"If we are to have peace on earth, our loyalties must become ecumenical rather than sectional. Our loyalties must transcend our race, our tribe, our class, and our nation; and this means we must develop a world perspective."

"Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?'"

"Almost always, the creative dedicated minority has made the world better."

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

"Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love."

"Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend."

"It is not enough to say we must not wage war. It is necessary to love peace and sacrifice for it."

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."

"Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree."

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”

“It does not matter how long you live, but how well you do it.”

"Whatever your life's work is, do it well. A man should do his job so well that the living, the dead, and the unborn could do it no better."

All photos are from Beaumont Enterprise.com.

All quotes are Dr. King's.

Happy New Year

2012-01-01T19:32:00.001-08:00

Happy New Year everyone!

I hope you all had a great holiday season and are starting January with pleasant memories. I always expect January to start with a bang, as if I'm going to accomplish all my goals for the year in the next couple of days. Ha! I'm not even setting any resolutions this year, as I know my past track record, and it's pretty dismal. Although last year I did do pretty well at the 21-day challenge at A Bowl Full of Lemons. I definitely need something like that to keep me on track. This year, though, I see as more of a contemplative, slower-paced year. Not sure why, but I do. Anyway, before I get to waxing more about that, I just wanted to share a few pics from Christmas. It was quite relaxing this year. Right up my alley.

I decorated a bit, but didn't feel the need to go all out.

Just a bit on the mantle,

some lights to cozy up the place,

and some greenery thrown around a bit here and there.

Understated but still festive. And a whole lot easier to clean up.

We started off the holidays by getting to babysit some cutie patooties (aka little brothers)

and then hosted Christmas Eve for some of Ralph's family.

Lots of laughs were had by all

even if the teenagers didn't want to admit it.

Christmas day brought lots of silver and black, natch.

And wait, are those actual smiles on teenagers' faces??

Oh, yeah, especially since they got the video games they wanted. [Side note: Teen 2 said that one of his friends asked him why he didn't buy the newest video game right when it came out. He replied, "Why buy it with my own money when I can just wait for Christmas and get it for free?" Smart kid.]

So lots of family time

accompanied by lots of food

(one of my few culinary successes, wish I'd taken pics of Ralphs' AWESOME pozole)

left us all fat and happy.

Looking ahead to 2012, I've tried to do what some others have done and pick a word for the year to focus on. Words like "believe," "love," "simplify," and "look" tend to be bandied about. I've tried to think of one, and even came up with a list, but none seem to just jump out at me. I think I'll need longer to contemplate it. I know most people do this before the new year starts, so they're all ready. Being the procrastinator that I am, I'm behind as usual. But since I have the feeling that this year is going to be a more slowly-moving, (hopefully that means peaceful?) year, I'm not going to get to worked up about it. Some of the words I've come up with so far are:

seek

purpose

trust

fearless

choose

rejoice

believe

create

focus

clarity

calm

strength

Do any of you do this? How do you go about picking a word? Or does the word pick you? In either case, happy picking, and Happy New Year.

Perspective

2011-12-14T08:15:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been thinking about how my perspective has changed over the years. For example, my stepsons used to be smaller than me. Little cherubs that gazed up adoringly at me. (I almost choked on my coffee writing that last part.) From my perspective now, things are a bit different.

Exhibit A

We recently marked each person's height in the entryway to the kitchen. (I'm 5' 3 1/2".)

Do you know how hard it is to scold someone while you're looking up at them? (And they're looking down at you, laughing...)

Exhibit B
(as if the height humiliation wasn't enough)

Comparing shoe sizes.
(I wear a 7 1/2 - 8, so I don't have tiny feet.)

So yeah, my perspective's had to change, whether I like it or not. The same has happened with my perspective on the holidays.

I love Christmas, but I've always set high expectations for myself that I can never achieve:

• Completely decorate the house for Christmas so it looks like a winter wonderland, complete with handmade crafts in every room.

• Bake/create homemade goods for all the neighbors and wrap them in adorable packages.

• Find the perfect gift for everyone and have it bought, wrapped, shipped and sent out soon after Thanksgiving so I can relax and enjoy the holiday season with all items on my to-do list done!

• Take the perfect picture for the Christmas card and send them out the day after Thanksgiving.

Now, factor in that I'm a major procrastinator and the fact that I don't manage stress well and you've got a recipe for disaster in melt-down proportions.

Something had to give. And that something was my perspective of the "perfect" Christmas. Last year really helped with that. Due to various circumstances, we ended up not seeing family on Christmas Day. Instead of the usual racing around and trying to fit everyone in, it was just the five of us.

And it was one of the best Christmases I've ever had.

It was so relaxing, so void of insane expectations, that right then and there I gave up the idea that the perfect Christmas had to be filled with everyone you know and love.

Other ideas changed too.

• Decorating the house: I have the tree up and some lights and other baubles thrown around. Not a handmade craft in sight. And you know what? It's just fine.

• Neighbors: Last year I baked cookies on Christmas Day just so I could finally bring them a gift. Not doing that this year! The neighbors are getting tins of popcorn for Christmas. They're already in Christmas tins, so no wrapping either!

• Gifts: I still struggle with this, but we cut way down on our gift list this year so we are not racing around trying to find a gift for everyone. Not being around too many people will help this. Unfortunately, I ordered one gift a little too late, and it won't get here til after Christmas. There is NOTHING I can do about it, so I'm determined not to go crazy about it. So far, so good.

• Christmas card: I learned early on that my idea of the "perfect" picture just wasn't going to work in my family of stoic men. Asking them to smile for a picture at the Christmas tree lot after picking out the "perfect" tree got me this:

It looked like I just told everyone their grandma had just died.
(And look! They were still smaller than me!)

I wised up and realized that my trying to force them into fake smiles and festive outfits (ha!) just made everything worse. So I just started taking pictures of the real us.

One year I didn't even bother to tell them to behave.

I just wrote "From Our Wild Bunch to Yours, Merry Christmas."
Everyone who got the card that year loved it.

I may be the only one smiling in this year's picture, but at least I'm keepin' it real. It showed us together as a family, and that's the important thing.

And it was a LOT less hassle.

How has your perspective of the holidays changed over the years?

Empty

2011-12-09T10:26:00.001-08:00

Holy moly.

I think this is the first time since I started working at my current job six years ago that I have had an EMPTY inbox!! Had to take a screen shot to commemorate it since it will probably be another six years before it happens again. Kind of like a lunar eclipse...

Happy Friday!

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-12-04T19:06:00.000-08:00

Eh, I'm only two weeks late with my Thanksgiving post. Truth is, I'm enjoying relaxing. This season I'm determined not to run around like a crazed maniac just because society and the retailers say I should. I did not, nor do I ever plan to participate in Black Friday. I did however,

Eat. A. TON.

Most of my pictures from Thanksgiving either show us cooking food or eating food.

Sounds about right.

Here's me and my mom racing around the kitchen doing last minute prep.

And Ralph giving some fatherly advice on making gravy.

And carving The Bird.
(Which only took two hours longer to cook than originally planned. Sweet.)

The next day I felt bad for having starved my parents the day before, so we decided to have Ralph's mom and fiancé over for more food.

Yes, there was more food than this.

I love men in the kitchen.

I did finally decide to extricate myself from the table and my parents and I waddled around The Getty museum for a day. Its architecture, gardens, and views are just as impressive as the art.

We also forced the boys into some mandatory physical activity.

The rest of the time was spent mostly doing this:

Relaxing, sleeping, lavishing attention on the mutts.

All in all, a lot less stressful than I thought it would be.
I hope Christmas is the same.

Turkey

2011-11-24T13:53:00.001-08:00

Finally got this sucker subdued.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

And They Became One Flesh

2011-11-01T07:06:00.000-07:00

One year ago today.

I'm so lucky

so happy

so thankful

so blessed.

Happy Halloween Everyone!!

2011-10-31T09:48:00.000-07:00

Limited Medium

2011-10-26T10:19:00.001-07:00

I came across this quote the other day on the Nester's site and thought it was apropos to my life right now.

Much of the beauty that arises in art comes from the struggle the artist wages with his limited medium.

—Matisse

Well, the limited medium part, anyway. Seems like my life doesn't quite make good blog fodder, so I haven't had much to write lately. I have to hope, though, that if I continue to try and make posts out of nothing but ordinary, everyday type stuff, that somehow some beauty will come from creating them.

Does anyone else feel like their lives are just too boring to write about?

Friday Fun ~ My New Heroes

2011-10-14T06:42:00.001-07:00

I first saw this on Ralph's cousin's Facebook and I immediately fell in love with these two little sprites.

Then, when I saw them on Ellen, I realized they were my absolute heroes, the type of person I've always wanted to be.

I want to be Sophia Grace when I grow up.

Teaching our Daughters (and Sons)

2011-10-12T06:51:00.000-07:00

Saw this on a friend's Facebook page.

Makeup Monday: On Beauty

2011-10-10T13:24:00.000-07:00

I sometimes (okay rarely) have Makeup Mondays on this here blog, discussing makeup ideas, tips and tricks. Today, I'm just not feelin' it, probably because I've felt pretty crummy about my appearance as of late. I found this sign and thought it was good for today.

(found via Christine's Pinterest)

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

2011-10-06T06:26:00.001-07:00

(source)

(title of post from Jobs' often-quoted commencement address given at Stanford University in 2005)

Attempted Murder

2011-10-04T06:05:00.000-07:00

What can I say? I amuse easily.

(original source unknown, as it's been floating around everywhere. I found it on my friend's Facebook page.)

Dear Monday

2011-10-03T06:50:00.000-07:00

(source)

2011-09-30T11:14:00.000-07:00

So I updated my blog and header a day early. Partially because I LOVE LOVE LOVE Halloween and can't wait to decorate and dress up and eat lots and lots of candy.

And partially because I'm kind of ready for September to be over. The beginning of school and football practice always bring total chaos, and I'm ready to settle into the routine. That and I'm ready to be done shelling out big bucks for everything from back-to-school clothes to fundraisers to football gear. (Oh, I know, that stuff never stops, it just seems like September tends to drain us faster than most months.)

Coincidentally, Heather at Dooce made an observation about September on her blog yesterday. It totally makes sense to me, and is something I hadn't thought about before. Go check it out.

Here's to Halloween, cooler weather (only 90° today, woo hoo!) and loads and loads of candy.

It's So Fluffy!

2011-09-29T11:04:00.000-07:00

I have no idea what made me think of this today. Wait, yes I do. Thrifty Decor Chick was describing the fall wreath she made. And it reminded me of this clip from Despicable Me. The last couple seconds are some of my favorite in cinematic history. I rewound this a million times when I watched the movie.

Enjoy

Happy Little Trees

2011-09-28T04:40:00.000-07:00

(image source)

As a kid I remember that on Saturday afternoons, after there were no more cartoons or Abbot and Costello movies, Bob Ross could be found creating his paintings with "happy little trees." I was always amazed at how quickly he could create a painting and make it look so easy.

I always found him a bit odd, but in a nice, grandfatherly, harmless kind of way. Some compared him to Mr. Rogers.

During my teens, I took great pleasure in seeing that MTV mainstreamed Bob Ross as well.

The other day I came upon this picture and it just made me smile, remembering those days of watching him create his landscapes of happy little trees.

(image source unknown)

Guess I'm not the only one who remembers him fondly. Or oddly.

Happy Birthday Google

2011-09-27T08:30:00.000-07:00

from the Google site itself

Google is 13 years old today.

I remember vividly a conversation I had with a computer programmer probably around the time Google came into being. I was getting my teaching credential at the time, and I was trying to gather information for various papers I was writing for my classes. I recounted to him that I had spent quite a while on the computers at the college library trying (unsuccessfully) to find sources and other info.

I remember telling him that I didn't think this World Wide Web thing was really going to take off. There wasn't that much information on it, and what articles I could find were only in bits and pieces. I was not very impressed.

At least I never claimed to be a forward thinker.

Or someone with more than two brain cells.

Monday Musings: Depression

2011-09-26T06:19:00.000-07:00

My uncle had this quote as his Facebook status the other day. I think it's a good reminder to those of us who suffer from depression and the like.

"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.” — William Gibson

Happy Monday

Illusion

2011-09-24T00:00:00.000-07:00

I originally found this via Design Share. Pretty darn cool. I never would have been able to picture that beforehand, let alone know how to build it.

First Day of Autumn

2011-09-23T07:10:00.000-07:00

The IE (Inland Empire) is odd for many reasons, one of them being that it can't follow a calendar to save its life. Here it is, the first day of Autumn, and this how we're going to celebrate:

I refuse to succumb to the heat, though, and I'm going ahead with Fall, at least indoors.

Here are a few things I'm thinking of whipping up, although in all reality I probably won't have time to do much other than throw a few plastic pumpkins on the mantle. (I suppose I could drag a bag with glue, twine, scraps, etc. to the footballs games and practices, but my stepsons think I'm embarrassing enough already.)

Anywho, even if I don't get to do these, they're still fun to look at.

Recaptured Charm made an awesome dollar-store twine pumpkin

Jaime at That's My Letter also used twine to decorate these adorable pumpkins.

The Nester made a ton of book page crafts and decor for her sister's book release party. I especially loved this leaf and vine creation.

I have a ton of coffee filters and have wanted to do something with them for a while. I love this Fall wreath at Mary's Meanderings.

Sweet Something Design made a maple-leaf garland using plaster leaves, much better than those garish colors they started out with.

And there are always cloth pumpkins to try, like these flannel pumpkins at The V Spot

I have a wool sweater with about 13 holes in it, screaming to be used for something crafty. This would be perfect.

Jean at Prim Crafts used muslin

I love these sweater pumpkins at Happy to Design

And more from Mary's Meanderings

Of course, I'm always up for something glittery, and these gals have gussied up some pumpkins with glitter spray paint, which I'm assuming is pure happiness in a can.

Infarrantly Creative made glitter pumpkins for her gorgeous tablescape

So did Tatertots and Jello

Sigh. So many pretties, so little time.

Have a great weekend.

End of Summer in the IE: A Haiku

2011-09-20T10:10:00.000-07:00

Only three more days
Tired of triple digits
Hurry up, Autumn

(source)

Ten on Tuesday ~ Ohio Edition

2011-09-13T11:38:00.000-07:00

Ten things I loved about going to visit my grandmother a couple of weeks ago (in no particular order):

1. Escape from the 150° (only a slight exaggeration) heat in So Cal. Even the rats were wilting, and they are hardy creatures.

He looks dead, but he's just laying there bemoaning his existence in the horrid heat.

2. Time spent with family. Almost the entire California contingent trekked out to Ohio for my grandma's birthday and annual family reunion. It was great catching up.

3. Spending time with this lovely lady in purple and red.

Ninety-five years young, she is. And still sharp as a tack, too.

4. Getting to see that my 95-year old grandmother is still very active. When not traipsing up and down the halls getting her daily exercise (the nurses call her Speedy), she can be found doing puzzles, chatting it up with residents and employees alike, and trying her hand at pottery and other crafts.

Squirrel, by Angeline Kuhel

5. The FOOD. Yes it needs to be in ALL CAPS. Not only because it was all delicious, but because there was so much of it!

Kielbasa and pasties are traditional Slovenian dishes served at most get togethers.

6. Receiving a stone from the foundation of my grandmother's original homestead up in Michigan.

7. Watching old black and white movies, just Grandma and me.

8. Getting to see my grandma meet my brother's wife for the first time.

9. Getting to look through my brother's wedding album for the first time.

10. Coming home to a wonderful family and remembering how much I love them. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder.

Makeup Monday: Hooded Eyes

2011-09-12T06:07:00.001-07:00

What are hooded eyes? Some people call them bedroom eyes, I guess to try and make them sound more sexy. Or something.

Basically, hooded eyes are eyes that don't show much eyelid, but rather have the puffy part beneath your brow folding over your lid, concealing it from view.

Exhibit A (moi):

Sorry for the craptastic pics. I only had my phone.

Some famous people with hooded eyes:

Blake Lively

Leelee Sobieski

I think many people who go in for eye lifts have hooded eyes. The hoods tend to droop with age. I swear mine are going to be resting on my eyelashes soon.

So how to keep from looking like you're super sleepy or have really puffy eyes? Click on the links of the stars' name above; the sites offer some great tips for hooded eyes.

One of my favorite tutorials is from Marlena at Makeup Geek:

She's got great tips for all kinds of looks, and she has tutorials for all eye shapes.

The main thing I learned is a tip that seems counter-intuitive at first. The darker shadow should actually go on the hooded part of the eye and not on the lid. It seems like that would make that part of the eye stand out and look like you have way too much makeup on. But if you think about it, we use dark colors to detract attention from something, like wearing black to look slimmer. By using lighter colors on the lid, those colors draw attention to the eye and not the hood above.

After trying this method, I actually got nice comments on my makeup, and I never get comments on my makeup.

Hope this helps for you fellow bedroom-eyed beauties.

Where Were You?

2011-09-11T17:37:00.001-07:00

Ten years ago at 6 AM (Pacific Standard Time) I was getting ready to head out for work. I was listening to my morning radio show as I was getting ready and in between their silly antics they broke the news that a plane had hit one of the twin towers. "How sad," I thought. "What a terrible accident." I didn't think much more of it until a few minutes later the DJ broke in again saying that a second plane had hit the other tower.

We all let that sink in for a few seconds and our minds finally caught up. It was no accident. I swear I could actually feel my brain flipping that switch.

I turned on the TV and saw the breaking news, along with the horrible scene of the second plane hitting. Unfortunately, I had to head in to work, so I got in my car and continued listening to the radio as I drove.

School, unfortunately, started as usual, with my kids (being only third graders) not really knowing what was going on. I talked with them a little bit about it, but realized that their parents hadn't had time to fully fill them in. Our principal had said to continue to teach as usual.

The kids were rowdier, like they could sense the tension in the air. Lots more rough housing. But other than that, they went about the day like any other school day. I'd have to sneak down to the office at recess and lunch to listen to the secretary's radio. That's how I heard about the Pentagon.

Back-to-School Night, scheduled for that day, was obviously cancelled. Instead, we had a meeting after school about what we would say to the kids the next day, as they would surely be exposed to a lot of news and information at home that night.

None of us had any answers.

We simply had to keep going. Keep moving forward.

Where were you?

Not Exactly Urban

2011-08-30T06:57:00.000-07:00

Click on picture to enlarge.

I often forget how aggie parts of the IE are. We had some interesting spectators at the scrimmage last night. They didn't seem too bothered that there were lots of loud children so close to their habitat.

I'm sure the kids that go to that school don't even notice them anymore.

Me on the other hand? I was a bit bothered by all the flies that seem to accompany them. And let's not even talk about the smell.

I Just Remembered That I Used to Be Smart ~ Part 1

2011-08-24T05:22:00.000-07:00

Me as a towheaded two-year old.

A couple of weeks ago I came across Kelly's blog and read her post on being a gifted kid. It suddenly reminded me that at one point in my life, I was actually considered gifted.

Heather with heather

I, like Kelly, started kindergarten a year early, although unlike her I was always the smallest of my classmates and often the most timid.

Even though I cried every day during math in third grade (and was ridiculed by my teacher for it), I also remember him passing around my research reports on Colombia and raccoons (two separate reports, not one about Colombian raccoons) to other teachers to show as a good example.

4th grade, I think

In sixth grade I was identified as a GATE kid and went to a separate classroom for math(!) with two other kids.

In middle school I got straight A's and while things didn't necessary come easily to me, I had the determination and confidence to push through until I succeeded.

It's around that time that everything started to fall apart.

to be continued...

Learning Isn't Pretty

2011-08-23T06:40:00.000-07:00

Remember way back when I posted this video I saw at a conference?

(Here's the video that actually shows him speaking. I had a totally different picture of him in my mind!)

I swear I can watch this every day. Makes me want to get back into the trenches of teaching.

Seriously.

I happened upon a review of it in the Seattle P-I. I especially loved this part:

...learning is not pretty. It is a fist fight of the mind and the only way to comprehend and appreciate what we have learned, [is] to pick ourselves back up and continue.

~ Jeremy Tolbert
"Slam Poet Taylor Mali on What Teachers Make"

That could just as well be about life, no?

Carnivorous

2011-08-17T05:49:00.000-07:00

I have nothing against vegans. I myself didn't eat any flesh for 6 years. But living with red-blooded carnivores who at times won't even discriminate between pork chops and my fingers as I put the plate in front of them, I thought this sign was pretty hilarious.

(I can't remember where I found this. Passive-aggressive notes, perhaps?)

Ugh-ust

2011-08-02T12:07:00.000-07:00

The last day of July brought a lovely surprise: rain.

In the desert.

In the middle of the summer.

(loving the raindrops on top of the pool)

That NEVER happens.

I mean, it actually poured.

Can you tell I haven't deadheaded the flowers in a while?

I know to most people in the country this is a daily occurrence in the summer, but here, it's practically unheard of. And it brought the temps down to around 75°, much cooler than the usual 95°+. It was so refreshing.

And then August had to get all uppity and start herself off with her usual icky-ness:

If the little brat follows her usual recourse, we have an entire month of triple-digit temperatures to look forward to.

A month with heat so intense that it literally saps every bit of energy (plus my will to live) out of my body. (Have I mentioned that we don't use the AC?)

And the worst part? August usually bullies September into following suit.

Just shoot me now.

Do You Really Need Another Reason to Hate Ironing?

2011-07-23T05:00:00.000-07:00

There are so many already. Here are just a few more.

Originally found via The Inspired Room.

History of Rap

2011-07-22T06:48:00.000-07:00

I happen to love Justin Timberlake. I think he's funny, talented, and I love that he's always willing to poke fun of himself. I'd heard about the History of Rap (2) song he did with Jimmy Fallon (also love!) earlier this week and finally came upon the video. It's pretty awesome.

Here's the first History of Rap for your enjoyment.

And I just have to throw in my favorite JT sketch of all time, one that is near and dear to my heart because I have three stepsons of my own. (And I'm sure they're happy that no time they've ever spent with me has required leotards and heels.)

Have a great weekend everyone.

2011-07-19T10:23:00.001-07:00

Found this today on Life in Rehab.

I first saw artists like these down on Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco quite a few years ago. Still amazes me every time.

Snapshots From the Fourth and a Question. Okay, Two.

2011-07-12T06:52:00.000-07:00

Only eight days late. Not bad. Truth is, it's been so dang hot that I can barely function and the computer is in a super hot corner of the house. The thought of sitting down and roasting to try and crank out a post just wasn't appealing enough to me.

Yesterday, however, the weather finally turned and it's only supposed to get into the 80s for the rest of the week. Woo hoo!

This is the temp on the Fourth of July as I went to the store:

I had to buy extra cookies to make cookie dough pie - best hot-day dessert EVER. There is no cooking involved, so you don't have to turn on the oven, and it's so cool and refreshing.

Coco was the only one willing to risk the heat for awhile. (And even she's in the shade.) I just stayed inside and took pics.

We finally went out to BBQ and pulled the grill under the tree so the largest body in the universe wouldn't roast us to a crisp. (Did you know that the sun accounts for 99% of the solar system's total mass? For reals.)

Daisy, of course, watched the ground intently for falling scraps.

We didn't even have to rally to drive to see fireworks. All of our neighbors had illegal ones, so we had a 360° show right from the back yard.

The dogs were NOT fans of the fireworks. Coco barked herself silly and ran around chasing them in the sky. The other dogs just chased her instead. It was quite the cacophony, what with fireworks exploding and every dog in the neighborhood going insane.

The next day Coco simply lay in the back yard, all tuckered out from her long night.

Blue was nice enough to join her.

Okay, so I have a camera question. I took all these pics with my phone, because my camera will only turn on long enough to tell me to turn it off. The lens is stuck in the open position, and I put new batteries in it and that didn't help. Does anyone know what can be wrong with it? It's just a little point and shoot jobby, do those have a short shelf life? It's about 5 years old.

Also, Ralph's camera has suddenly decided to take pictures with bright lines across them, blocking out the whole picture. Anyone know what that's all about? Are aliens invading?

Still Life at Work

2011-06-29T05:51:00.000-07:00

I call it "Waiting for Lunch"

Yes, I need to find more productive things to do with my time.

More'n One Way to Skin a Cat

2011-06-27T06:09:00.000-07:00

As the temperatures start creeping into the upper 90s (with 100s right around the corner), the weather has been on my mind lately. A lot. I'm not a huge fan of being hot and sticky and thirsty and unable to sleep due to hundred plus degree temperatures.

I can only imagine what it would be like for the poor critters that are cursed/blessed with tons of fur.

I used to have a cat named Tippy. She was a rescue cat and came with that name, not sure why. Maybe because she only had a tip of a tail? Who knows.

Tippy was freakin' awesome. She was super affectionate and would actually run to the door to meet me when I came home from work.

She was also a total brat.

And a little on the plump side.

Being that she was very furry and somewhat obese, I figured that the summer heat must be driving her more crazy than it was me. Often times I would find her on the bathroom tile floor, trying to find a bit of coolness to soak up in the otherwise roasting apartment.

I decided to take action and try and bring some relief to my poor rotund cat.

I'd heard of animals getting their fur shaved for the summer and figured it would help Tippy's situation. Also, the vet had someone on site that would do it. So one morning before work, after I'd hog-tied her and wrestled her into her carrier, (my coworkers wondered at my scratched and bleeding arms) I dropped Tippy off to get a "lion cut." This is a cut where most of the cat's hair is shaved off, but the head and paws are left long, perhaps looking like a lion's mane?

I had been a little apprehensive about the process, as Tippy is less than cooperative at the vet, but I signed off for her to have a light sedative and figured that would be all that was needed to get her through the "ordeal."

I had no idea what I had just signed her up for.

The vet told me when I came to pick her up that she yowled the ENTIRE TIME, even with the sedative. Plus it took two of them to hold her down while yet another shaved her.

I'm pretty sure they charged me extra.

One thing I learned upon picking her up (other than that she is a royal PITA and the vet never wanted to see her again) is that cat's skin is the same color as their hair. That doesn't sound bad, except when you have a cat with multi-colored fur. When their hair is removed, it looks like they have a skin disease.

Good God, maybe Tippy was yowling because she saw how wretched she looked.

Plus, without a tail, she looked like a plucked chicken. A diseased and rotting chicken.

She wouldn't acknowledge my presence for days. Not that I blame her.

I honestly don't know if it helped with the heat issue, as she looked pretty miserable regardless of the temperature. I never did that again, although I did have to get her a "panty shave" (yes, I swear that is a real term) every now and then because she was too roly-poly to be able to clean herself properly.

This tale of woe has been a PSA for any of you thinking about helping your pet through the summer months. All I'm asking is that you seriously consider the aftereffects.

Tippy's and my relationship was never the same.

Father's Day

2011-06-20T13:40:00.000-07:00

(I had to take most of these pictures with my crummy camera phone. Click to enlarge and you'll get a better peek into our day.)

I hope everyone had a great Father's Day. We spent it relaxing and barbequing. The boys were supposed to barbeque for Dad, and they had good intentions. They even took a whack at it:

Until more important things like basketball came up.

It's okay, honey, at least the dogs are still hanging out with you. They love you like a dad.

Come time to eat, though, everyone reconvened and dug in. I couldn't even get a picture with them looking at me because they were too busy devouring the delicious carne asada.

I have to watch my fingers at dinner time. Can't get them too close to a teenage boy's mouth or I might draw back missing a few...

Especially when I make monkey bread. (BTW, this is the only thing I've ever made that actually turns out looking like the picture.)

And holy moly is it good. I made it the night before and when I came down in the morning there were exactly three little nuggets left for Ralph on Father's Day.

Sorry about that, honey. Next time I'll make it the same day and then keep it under lock and key or at least hide it in a place where the boys never tread.

Like the laundry room.

As evidenced by their overflowing laundry baskets.

The rest of the weekend was spent relaxing. The animals were pooped from a long week of laying around looking cute, so they joined in the fun, too. If you walk into our house at any given time you will find at least two or three animal carcasses lying in your way:

And getting fur all over the furniture:

That evening, all the critters and people in the family were together in one room, relaxing and watching Animal Planet. (Daisy even barks at the TV now and then when she hears other dogs.) It was great to have everyone together as a family.

Thanks for bringing us all together, honey. It was an honor to celebrate you.

Peace Like a River

2011-06-13T18:00:00.000-07:00

I have no idea what the #@@%#^& Blogger is doing to my posts, but I'm gonna try this one more time...

The other day in the "break room" at work, (really the library where we keep the children's books we use in literature units) I wanted to do something other than sit and stare at my unappetizing ramen. There is a shelf of books that other employees bring in when they're done reading. It's quite an odd selection; everything from Harry Potter to recipes of Provincial France. I randomly selected a book to read called Peace Like a River.

(source)

I am so enjoying it! I've only read the first few chapters but I can't wait to read more. I just love the way the author uses language. He cracks me up with the narrator's self-effacing humor ("I'm happy to say [no brain damage] surfaced until I entered tenth grade and signed up for Plane Geometry") and I even love the chapter titles (Beauteous Are My Cakes Indeed, Peeking at Eternity).

I actually can't read it at work because I get too sucked in by it and then forget the time. Darn work getting in the way.

Another book I just learned about sounds intriguing as well, but for very different reasons. The book is about the musicians on the Titanic who continued to play even while it was sinking.

(source)

I know the movie romanticised it, but it just seems so noble and kind for them to stay and continue playing.

I couldn't find a clip with it, but I love it when the lead musician says, "Gentlemen, it's been an honor playing with you tonight." Makes me want to weep.

Too bad it's such a long wait on Netflix right now. I totally want to see it again.

Any books you'd recommend? I'm always looking for new titles!

Baby Braveheart

2011-06-01T06:40:00.000-07:00

I found this on Sydney's blog, The Daybook. I thought it was awesome and hilarious.

Crocheting Just Got Funky

2011-05-31T08:26:00.000-07:00

Our weekend was nice, busy. Spring cleaning, maintenance, graduation party. Didn't take any pictures (not that you'd want to any of me scrubbing suspicious carpet stains) so I thought I'd post some images that I've had lying around in my hard drive for awhile.

Just for fun. I think I used to have an outfit like this; my grandma crocheted all kinds of fun stuff for me.

(image source)

For whenever I get down about being unorganized, a reminder that there is such a thing as too organized.

(source)

Some things I've been wanting to make:

(by the firefly moon)

Root beer float cake by lazy chef recipes:

A scarf/safety pin summery shirt by ...love Maegan:

This wreath, although I've only made three flowers so far and I'm convinced it will take a bazillion hours:

(from Under the Table and Dreaming)

Some quotes I like. (I can't remember the sources. They're not mine, though, so it doesn't count as plagiarism.)

And this? This just made my day.

Have a good week everyone.

2011-05-26T05:52:00.000-07:00

I'm not the kind of blogger that plans my posts ahead of time in nice, organized themes. I'm more of the last-minute, fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants, procrastinating type. That's why most of my posts have the label "random bits" and usually have no rhyme or reason. Kind of like the rest of my life. Often it seems like my life is just a series of random bits somehow strung together in a way that makes absolutely no sense to me. Same with the thoughts in my head. Hence the following list (and name of this blog):

• Yesterday I was chased by no less than four dogs on my run. One got close enough to scratch my leg. Now I know why everyone I see out for an evening walk is carrying sticks. There is one woman who even walks with a golf club. I bought pepper spray.

• Lately I've had all these memories popping up out of nowhere about embarrassing things that happened to me in the past. I hate reliving those cringe-worthy times. Like the time I gave a presentation in my Spanish class about Japanese fighting fish only to find out later that it was supposed to be about Latino culture. Obviously my Spanish wasn't up to par.

• Recently I came across a quote in a magazine article by Eric Schmidt, the CEO of Google:

"Every two days we create as much information as we did from the dawn of time until 2003."

That kind of blew my mind.

• David Hasselhoff claims to have magical powers. He recorded a message to a boy in a coma, and when the boy's parents played the recording, the boy immediately woke up. Apparently the Hoff claims to have proof of this happening all over the world. There is so much to love about that man.

• We've put a lot of energy into fixing up the yard with a nice, luscious lawn for the dogs complete with shady trees yet Blue still insists on laying on the 105° cement in direct sun.

• I'm about three months behind in planting flowers in the garden. (If/when I finally do decide to plant them, I'm sure Blue will pick that as his new favorite place to cop a squat.)

• I have no idea what I'm doing in this picture from our recent trip up north but it looks like I have to go to the bathroom.

I also look like a bag lady.

*Edited to add:

I just input my blog into Wordle to see what would come up, and yes, it's just as random as everything else on here. (Also, I apparently type like I talked in the 80s since "like" is the biggest [i.e. most often-used] word on there.)

Happy Feet: Spray Paint Your Life

2011-05-18T08:05:00.000-07:00

I swear the wind watches and waits until I have the spray can in my hand before it starts up. No matter, I still paint with abandon. And splattered cement in a pool area is very artsy.

I got a wild hair one day and decided I had to get myself out of my funk I'd been in for months. I had stumbled across these shoes, and thought to myself, "Hey, I have a whole can of purple spray paint!"

(image source)

Purple is not usually a color I use, but it had been for one of the boys' Halloween costumes and I'd only used a tiny bit.

I rummaged around in my closet and found some shoes that I hadn't worn in a while:

Personally, I like these guys, but people told me I looked like I was about to go rock climbing and my husband thinks they're hideous.

So I used the remainder of a roll of painting tape and some napkins, and started priming.

These soaked up a lot of primer and paint, and took quite a few applications. Still, I was happy with the result.

(There's a spot by my right big toe with primer peeking through. Meh.)

I'm not sure why I insisted on contorting myself into odd positions instead of just taking the darn things off.

I'm sure the hubs still thinks they're hideous, but he's been sweet enough to stay quiet about it.

Another project I thought turned out well was painting some bowls from the Dollar Tree and a jewelry holder. I got the holder as a gift and loved the concept, but not the pink.

I was painting the shoes at the same time, mostly because I was too impatient to just sit around watching paint dry.

I glued a candlestick onto one of the bowls,

got jiggy with the spray paint and then set them up like so:

Sorry I didn't get a closeup of the individual pieces, but trust me, they really do look nice. (You can click the pics to enlarge them a bit.)

The cloth on the jewelry-holder dress absorbed a lot of paint, and there's still a bit of pink showing through, but it just makes it look a little more antique, I think.

I say, spray paint whatever you like: cloth, leather, one of the kids. What have you got to lose?

For more awesome spray paint projects, go over to Thrifty Decor Chick's Spray Paint Party!

Pink Is Not My Favorite Color

2011-05-12T07:44:00.000-07:00

I've never been much for pink. I never decorated with it or wore it, except in small quantities and only in toned-down shades. This is fine considering I live with men whose favorite color is black and would probably vomit at the sight of pink.

Don't feel too bad for "not quite red," though, Steven Tyler is totally in love with it.

I don't usually have a huge aversion to it, except when it takes over my eye and therefore my life for a few crummy days.

Pink eye stink eye fink eye.

Blech. Oh the joy of throwing out a bunch of makeup and sanitizing all my brushes. And washing my hands every two minutes. And dealing with the irritation of desperately wanting to rub the itchiness away.

But now, a week later, things are finally looking up.

Now I can only blame lack of sleep.

2011-04-28T09:15:00.000-07:00

I keep seeing this pop up lately and like the message:

Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed.

Most putts don’t drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration.

Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise… Life is like an old-time rail journey — delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed.

The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.

Jenkins Lloyd Jones

“Big Rock Candy Mountains”
Deseret News, June 12, 1973, A4

2011-04-27T10:16:00.000-07:00

Okay now, this is just getting ridiculous.

Today I Feel Like George But I'm Dressed More Like RuPaul

2011-04-26T10:29:00.000-07:00

I saw the link for this Seinfeld clip on the Nester's site and thought, yeah, that's me today. (I tried to embed the video but it's copyrighted or some such crap. Just click the link. It's only 20 seconds.)

Today I'm feeling:

uninspired
like just giving up
tired
like my to-do list is way too long and boring
lethargic
bitter
old
you get the idea

But instead of putting on some (very tempting) comfy clothes to wallow in and even comfier shoes, I chose these out of my closet instead:

(image source of these 5" platform heels)

Yes, I actually own a pair of these shoes.

I'm hoping these will get me out of my funk.

I think I've worn them twice.

I'm glad I sit at a desk most of the day.

My coworkers think I'm crazy.

I think they are probably right.

I have to admit it's hard to wallow when all your concentration is focused on trying not to fall and/or break an ankle.

Diversion. It's a great antidepressant. Drag queens are on to something.

I Can't Wait to See the Video

2011-04-21T07:38:00.000-07:00

This is Weird Al's parody of Gaga's "Born This Way." In this msn article it stated that originally Lady Gaga didn't approve, but it turns out that it was her manager who told Weird Al no. Gaga has since heard the song and given her blessing.

Can you imagine what kind of outfits he'll wear in the real video?

Triage

2011-04-13T09:00:00.000-07:00

My mom was an ICU and CCU nurse for 20 years. She always talked about how they had to deal with the most pressing and dire issues first and just get to the rest later. Like if someone has a compound fracture with their splintered fibula sticking out of their leg at a 90-degree angle and then goes into cardiac arrest, the heart is going to be dealt with first and the bone just has to wait.

I'm having to do that with my life right now. This blog is like a gangrenous appendage (I mean that in a good way!) that would normally get much attention but the rest of my life is a ruptured appendix right now. Hopefully there won't have to be an amputation.

Yes! I'm Not Alone!

2011-04-08T05:24:00.000-07:00

55% of the population agree with me that the color orange is simply hideous.

I don't know why I loathe orange so much. I like it in nature, but not anywhere else. It would literally keep me from buying something I REALLY wanted, even if it was the coolest thing in the world and was the only one left. You know why it's the only one left? Cause it's orange!

Read more about the study here. The funny thing is that I originally found it on the site, How About Orange, which I like, except for the fact that she loves orange.

When Harry Met Sally 2

2011-04-07T07:19:00.000-07:00

I just found this on Funny or Die and thought it was absolutely hysterical. I almost love it more than the original.

When Harry Met Sally 2 with Billy Crystal & Helen Mirren from Billy Crystal

Calling It In

2011-04-06T07:27:00.000-07:00

(These horseshoes have absolutely nothing to do with this post. I just thought they were funny.)

Yeah, I know, I've been calling it in the past few posts. It's not that I haven't wanted to write anything, I've just not had anything interesting to say. (Many might argue that I never have anything interesting to say.) I've also been lax on answering e-mails, returning telephone calls, or any kind of correspondence in general. It's not that I'm in a funk, so to speak. In fact, I'm finally feeling better after my last bout of depression. I guess that's why I'm not as tempted to surf the net, update my Facebook status, or chatter on incessantly about my everyday, mundane life. I kind of want to get out there and do some living for a change.

The other day I ran across a post by Ashley at Domestic Fashionista. She's reading a book by Donald Miller called A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. I went back and read all her posts about the book, and I love the introspection she puts in her posts.

The book is basically about Miller's experience working with screenwriters to make a movie based on his memoir. Problem was, his life was a bit too directionless for the big screen. So he set out to start living, rather than writing about living.

One quote from the book (that Ashley has in her post as well) particularly struck me:

People who live good stories are too busy to write about them. Nobody ever strapped a typewriter to the back of an elephant and wrote a novel while hunting wild game…

Not that I'm planning on riding an elephant or hunting wild game. Maybe just taming the wilds of our backyard and picking up some projects that have been languishing forever. Or savoring a delicious book or ten. Or perhaps even venturing out into the great IE and engaging with others. What a concept.

Spring weather seems to do this to me.

It also makes me want to add random pictures that have nothing to do with the post.

Sorry. I'll stop.

Anywho, I guess this is an excuse and an apology and a manifesto all rolled into one. Or something like that.

Carry on.

Find the unicorn meat here.

Commas Save Lives

2011-03-29T05:00:00.000-07:00

Today's public service announcement:

(source)

What Crayola Crayon Color Are You?

2011-03-28T12:57:00.001-07:00

You are most like: You are Blue
You are cool and soothing, with a hidden spontanious side. You are deeper than most people percieve, and you care a lot for those whom you surround yourself with.
Take this quiz: Which Crayola Box of 8 Color Are You?
Visit Toys For Your Blog.com for more blog quizzes

You are most like:

You are Blue

You are cool and soothing, with a hidden spontanious side. You are deeper than most people percieve, and you care a lot for those whom you surround yourself with.

Take this quiz: Which Crayola Box of 8 Color Are You?

Visit Toys For Your Blog.com for more blog quizzes

Yeah, That Sounds About Right

2011-03-25T05:13:00.000-07:00

"Truth is, the teenage brain is like a Ferrari: It's sleek, shiny, sexy, and fast, and it corners really well. But it also has really crappy brakes."

- Judith Newman, "What's Really going On Inside Your Teen's Head," Parade, November 28, 2010

(found in Middle Ground, Feb 2011)

Birthday Boy

2011-03-23T08:15:00.000-07:00

Even as a baby you were a heartbreaker.

And you're still devastatingly handsome.

But even more importantly, you're

compassionate

thoughtful

insightful

protective

honorable

giving

funny

witty

and a great cook to boot.

You're always there to lend a helping hand...

(Xbox repair)

...to all creatures great and small.

(habitat construction)

You are loyal, loving, and the most amazing dad I've ever had the pleasure to meet.

Happy birthday from the boys who are now all taller than you, and your wife who will never be.

That's why you married me, right?

Love you til the end of time, old man.

What Teachers Make

2011-03-21T13:47:00.000-07:00

I was at an educator's tech conference on Friday and one of the sessions started their presentation with this video. It was seriously awesome.

And Here I Thought It Took A Million Food-Color Droppers..

2011-03-17T07:58:00.001-07:00

to turn it this green.

(source)

Sponsored by the Plumbers Union, each year forty pounds of vegetable dye is poured into a section of the Chicago River to get this lovely shade of electric green for St. Patrick's Day. (They originally started with 100 pounds, but the river stayed green for a week.)

(source)

The dye actually starts out orange, and changes color once the powder hits the water.

(source)

The dye was originally used to detect leaks into the river.

(source)

Kinda makes for a nice backdrop, doncha think?

(source S1 Photography found via)

For more info, check out the Green Chicago River site.

Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone.

I Had No Idea

2011-03-14T08:08:00.000-07:00

Obviously I don't keep up with current events enough, because I was surprised to read this morning that Qaddafi has an all-female (and virgin) group of bodyguards.

(image source)

Some look like they just came off a set for a Tarantino movie.

(image source)

Quote from an interesting article on his female posse:

"On a good day, the bodyguards make Qaddafi look like Hef. On a bad day, a Bond villain. On every day, a crackpot."

Too bad they seem to be more interesting to most people for their sex appeal than the fact that they are an elite squad of trained fighters. And many reports refer to them as girls, rather than women. From another article:

"The beautiful security girl was one of a 40-strong, all-woman unit of personal guards who are trained killers and also claim to be virgins."

Even though on the surface they appear to be in positions of power, the fact that they are required to be virgins and more emphasis is placed on their appearance than in a typical male detail, seems to me like they still less than "equal."

But they do get to carry heavy artillery, so maybe that makes up for it?

There Are No Words

2011-03-11T13:11:00.000-08:00

These pictures make me feel not only tiny and insignificant but also scared and overwhelmed.

(all images)

I can't even imagine how people are feeling in Japan right now. I do wish that they don't lose hope.

I'm A Troll and Chuck Norris is 71 Years Awesome

2011-03-11T09:11:00.000-08:00

In all of Charlie Sheen's "winning" monologues lately and his bashing of Chuck Lorre et al, he'd at least stayed away from bashing his costars. But not anymore. Tuesday he lashed out at Jon Cryer (who will forever be Ducky in my mind) and called him a traitor and a troll for not calling/supporting him.

Jon responded in what I think is the most awesome rebuttal in this whole debacle:

Ducky, you seriously rock.

(image)

And not to diminish his amazingness by having him listed second in newsy importance, but Chuck Norris turned 71 yesterday!* (Please don't tell him that I'm only mentioning him today because of all the great facts floating around out there. I've never actually seen Walker, Texas Ranger or any of his movies. Please don't kill me Chuck Norris!)

In honor of this incredible day, here are some of my favorite Chuck Norris 'facts':

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

When the boogieman goes to sleep every night, he checks the closest for Chuck Norris.

Noah needed two of ALMOST everything on the Arc; he only needed one Chuck Norris.

There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

If you spell "Chuck Norris" in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch because he decides what time it is.

Tiger's blood is really Chuck Norris blood but Charlie Sheen will never tell.

The Incredible Hulk got "Chuck Norris Hands" for Christmas.

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

The best part of waking up isn't Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.

The show was called Walker, Texas Ranger because Chuck Norris never runs away from anything.

And HIS personal favorite: They wanted to put Chuck Norris' face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite was wasn't hard enough for his beard.

Anyone got another favorite?

* thanks to Ralph for alerting me to this holiest of days.

Phenomenal Woman

2011-03-08T07:11:00.000-08:00

I was thinking about the poem Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou and looked it up so I could read it to myself when I feel down. I especially love the first stanza. I also happened across many great quotes of hers and thought I'd compile some here. And paste them onto anything that will stand still so I can always see her powerful words.

Phenomenal Woman

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song."

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."

"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way (s)he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."

"Courage: the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can't practice any other virtue consistently."

"You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody."

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better."
(similarly: "Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.")

''The quality of strength lined with tenderness is an unbeatable combination, as are intelligence and necessity when unblunted by formal education.''

"...if the future road looms ominous or unpromising, and the roads back uninviting, then we need to gather our resolve and, carrying only the necessary baggage, step off that road into another direction. If the new choice is also unpalatable, without embarrassment, we must be ready to change that as well."

"If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don't be surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning "Good morning" at total strangers.''
(Oops, gotta remember this one.)

''I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.''

"A Woman in harmony with her spirit
is like a river flowing.
She goes where she will without pretense and arrives at her destination
prepared to be herself
and only herself "

On her writing process:
When I'm writing, I keep a hotel room. I have everything taken off the walls, and I bring in yellow pads, a Roget's Thesaurus, a dictionary, a Bible, a deck of cards and a bottle of sherry. I sit at a little table and play solitaire... My grandmother used to say when I was young, "You know, that's not even on my littlest mind." And so I determined that the human being has a big mind and a little mind. The cards occupy my little mind so I can get to the big mind and hear the language.

"You can't use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have."

"Each person deserves a day away in which no problems are confronted, no solutions searched for."

"Whining is not only graceless, but it can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the neighborhood."

"Living well is an art that can be developed: a love of life and ability to take great pleasure from small offerings and assurance that the world owes you nothing and that every gift is exactly that, a gift. "

"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return."

"No Matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow."

"Love life. Engage in it. Give it all you've got. Love it with a passion because life truly does give back, many times over, what you put into it."

Breakfast of Champions

2011-03-03T05:54:00.000-08:00

Yes, I eat my donuts with a fork and knife. Don't judge.

Ralph's been having to take some meds for his cold lately; one of which makes him really nauseous. Taking it with food helps a little bit, so we've just had to stop off at the donut store in the mornings. (Hey, any excuse'll do...)

The one by work is awesome. Tons of old timers used to meet there in the wee hours; we'd roll in around 5:30 and there'd already be a bunch of them. Nowadays they must go someplace else, because the only one in there today was a homeless lady with a bright red, shiny alligator purse, and some tweakers in the parking lot blaring Tori Amos from their car stereo.

Sweet.

Free Paint

2011-03-01T08:01:00.000-08:00

How cool is this? Valspar is giving away 1,000 paint samples a day for 100 days!

I originally found this out from The Shabby Chic Cottage. She got her sample and showed what came with it:

They even give you a little roller and paint trays!

I ordered Blue Mist, as we're looking to paint our kitchen a very light blue.

It takes 3-7 days to arrive. I can't wait.

Right now...

2011-03-01T07:18:00.000-08:00

I'm having trouble with:

• staying awake

• Blogger, but only on Firefox (weird)

• my neck and shoulders

• turning my head without pain

• answering all my e-mails

• coming up with even remotely interesting posts

• absorbing Lady Gaga's new video

Keep Walking

2011-02-24T07:41:00.000-08:00

(source)

I came across this text the other day from an article about doubt that Ralph passed along to me. I thought it fit well for dealing with depression as well.

All of us walk into that [dark] valley from time to time. Some of us spend a great deal of time there. But when you find yourself in that valley where all is uncertain and you are sorely tempted to give in to your doubts, fears and worries, remember these two words. Keep walking. Just keep walking. Nothing is gained by camping out in the valley of darkness. The only way out is to keep on walking. Every step forward is a way to “doubt your doubts.” Soon enough the light will shine again.

Just keep walking.

Just Random Bits and Trying to Focus on the Positive

2011-02-23T08:45:00.001-08:00

(source)

Nothing much to report other than I'm finally beating back the depression a bit. It's been a long bout this time, and it's still threatening to pull me under again, but I'm working on it. Mostly I try to ignore it by filling my mind with other things to do, but then it just wags its finger at me as if to say, "Oh, you and your silly diversion tactics. Don't you know they're futile?" Then it wallops me in the head and slows me down to a crawl.

This, of course, means that I don't get nearly as much done as I'd like, and I've been watching my to-do list grow exponentially. It's enough to just want to pull the covers over my head and not come out for another month.

Maybe one of these would help?

(Buy it here!)

BTW, the owner of that hand has quite lofty goals.

Anyway, with all the ~~crap~~ tasks piling up, I'm making a concerted effort to focus on some of the things I have gotten done recently to silence the naysayers in my head. [Plus, I'd like to remind them that I still manage to get up, go to work, and do all that other daily nonsense.]

Naysayers: You've totally slipped on your organization resolutions. You're just like everyone else who fails after the first week of January.
Me: I've maintained what I have organized so far, and just last week I did a full organization of my neglected cubicle at work. [That was quite refreshing, actually.]

Naysayers: It's about time you started spray painting those picture frames. They've been languishing by the couch for months. Plus, you only did five this weekend. There's about 20 more to go.
Me: At least I finally started. It's going to be a long project, yes, but I even if I just do one at a time, that's one more than I had finished before.

Naysayers: Speaking of spray painting, those shoes are going to take a long time too, and you know they're already not what you had pictured in your head.
Me: Hey, it was worth a shot, and you never know. I'm not going to give up just yet.

Naysayers: You mean like how you've given up on every other craft you've ever started?
Me: Hey, maybe I just needed to realize that I need super-short, easy crafts to do in order to complete them.

Naysayers: Yeah, well than everything you do is going to look cheap and shoddy.
Me: Yeah? Well tell that to Sew Can Do because she featured my grapefruit scrub this week! Boo-ya!

Hopefully that will shut them up a bit.

How do you try and silence the naysayers (real or imagined)?

Purple Makes Me Happy

2011-02-18T10:17:00.000-08:00

Sadly, there aren't a whole lot of things that have made me happy lately. So when I do come across something that lights a bit of a spark in my gray, dismal state, I take notice.

(dr. marten's website)

I saw these shoes and they somehow just made me happy. I have purple spray paint (leftover from an old Halloween costume) and I'm sure I have some old shoes languishing in the back of my closet.... I smell a weekend project coming on.

These also brightened my day:

I guess most people think of sunny colors like yellow and orange when they want to brighten something up. Not me. I'm a cool-color gal through and through.

My Dysfunctions

2011-02-18T07:06:00.000-08:00

Today I stumbled across the blog School Supply Dance as I was perusing Google images for a book I'm searching for. I just had to click on this:

Which led me to

And that's when I knew I was hooked.

They came from this journal which I am totally going to buy:

Click on image to enlarge.

While I'm at it, I think I need this one, too.

You can buy them from Knock Knock here.

Happy weekend everyone.

Talkin' in Your Sleep

2011-02-16T06:54:00.000-08:00

(source, and song, found here)

So the depression flood waters have receded a bit, but I feel like I'm still stuck in the mud, moving forward oh-so-slowly.

That's why I was very thankful for some comic relief the other night.

Ralph tends to talk in his sleep right after he dozes off, which often makes me think he's still awake. I'll ask him a question, and he'll say something like, "Stop asking questions now!" It won't be until the next morning that I'll ask him why he'd been so rude, and he'll look at me with a confused expression, not having any idea what I was talking about.

The other night I knew he'd already fallen asleep, so I went to take the remote control out of his hand to turn off the TV. He immediately yells, "Don't take my stuff!" To which I replied, "I'm just turning the TV off. You were already snoring." He exclaimed, "I wasn't snoring, I was thinking!" I started laughing so hard I was shaking the bed, waking him up. When I told him what he'd just said, he didn't remember it at all. But then he started laughing too.

Never a dull moment with that man, I tell ya.

There's a woman whose husband sleep talks all the time, saying bizarre, (and often expletive-filled) phrases. The funny part is that when he's awake he is very mild-mannered and never says anything like he does when he's asleep. She actually started a blog about it, complete with audio! [I think I may have mentioned the blog in a previous post, come to think of it.]

Click over to Sleep Talkin' Man for more hilarity. (Careful, though. If you don't like swear words you should probably stay away.)

For My Valentine

2011-02-14T09:58:00.000-08:00

Dear Ralph,

I can never seem to find the right words to tell you how much I love you. That's why I am forever grateful for sites like Cake Wrecks, as they have something for every occasion and they know just what to say.

Happy Valentine's Day, Honey.

Love,
Your co-dependent Ball and Chain.

Last-Minute So-Easy-a-Guy-Could-Do-It Valentine's Day Gift

2011-02-14T08:14:00.000-08:00

Ladies: Thank you for your patience while I walk through this project with the men. You can just skip down to the pictures if you'd like, since I know you're all intuitive enough to figure this out in 4 seconds flat.

No offense to the menfolk out there; I'm just sayin' that I know you last-minute types are super stressed right now and can't imagine taking on a big project for a gift. This will take you less than five minutes. Seriously.

And you have everything already at home. Or if you don't, you can race to the grocery store on your lunch break and get what you need:

• jar

• sugar

• dishwashing liquid

(bonus points for nice-smelling and pink)

I used Ajax's Ruby Red Grapefruit liquid; it makes for a perfect pink for Valentine's Day and it smells AWESOME.

I found this super easy recipe here:

She has lots of awesome ideas and I loved this scrub recipe of hers because it doesn't use oil, which I found to be a bit cloying in other recipes I've used.

Okay, so here's the play by play (like my sports lingo guys?):

1. If you don't have an empty jar, find one in your fridge and clean it out. I know you have at least a jelly jar or one with spaghetti sauce in there. Or, if you're already at the store getting sugar and dish soap, look for canning jars. [Bonus: canning jars come with cute labels you can use. I didn't realize this until I'd already made mine.]

2. Pour about a cup full of sugar into a bowl and then squeeze a dollop of dishwashing liquid in after it.

See how pretty?

Kind of cotton candy pink.

3. Mix the liquid and sugar around until you get a nice consistency, not too dry, not too runny. You do NOT need a lot of dish soap. Start with a small squirt and work your way up. Add more soap or sugar as needed.

4. Dump it in your jar.

5. Add a label. (Guys, you can make one of these at work [I used InDesign] so that all you have to do is slap/glue it on when you get home. Handwritten is fine.) Greenbean had a great idea for decorating the jars, too.

I put contact paper on one side of the label so that it could get wet without ruining it. Then I Mod Podged (Guys, that's craft talk for a product that's similar to white glue) the back of the paper and stuck it on the top of the jar.

The moisture from the Mod Podge discolored the paper a bit, but I actually like the different variegated colors it created.

I made these for women at work, and they all loved it. It's soooo easy! I might just add a drop of food coloring next time and use it for other holidays. St. Patrick's Day scrub, anyone?

So there you have it guys.* Super simple. And cheap.

And your lady won't think it's either one.

Now hurry!

* and lovely ladies who were so nice to click on my link!

P.S. Ladies, feel free to make this for your man. When I was making my batch, my too-cool teenage stepsons came in and tried it out of pure curiosity. They LOVED it!

Linking to:

My Funny Valentine

2011-02-11T11:12:00.001-08:00

Ralph and I don't get too mushy. One of our favorite jokes is that the closest he can come to saying "I love you" is "I tolerate you." [Don't worry, he totally tells me he loves me. After I passive-aggressively force him to.]

Seriously, though, he's awesome at this kind of stuff. Me? Not so much. I tend to lean toward humor in order to express my emotions, as "romantic" isn't exactly in my repertoire. Plus, I get vaguely ill when I try to express eternal love and adoration in syrupy-sweet terms. So here are a few of possibilities that he might be getting in his inbox on Monday.

What? You mean I'm still expected to use snail mail? Good grief.

Timely:

Literal:

Honest:

Thoughtful:

Eternal Pledge:

Succinct:

Hey, it gets the point across.

Yeah, I'm quite a catch.

images from someecards and mmmcrafts, respectively

Truth is Stranger Than Fiction: Psychiatrist Edition

2011-02-09T01:15:00.000-08:00

(source)

The depression roller coaster hasn't let me off yet, and lately I've been musing about some of the doctors I've had in the past that I've turned to for this particular malady. Other than my primary physician, I've seen a few psychiatrists in order to try and create a cocktail that would help me crawl out of these deep, dark holes and remain more even-keeled. Trouble is, I seem to have quite a hard time finding one that isn't completely insane themselves. [This isn't meant as a generalization of psychiatry per se, I'm only documenting my personal experience.]

I have had a run of very strange encounters with these doctors, who range from being benignly indifferent to one-flew-over-the-cuckoo's-nest crazy. Since moving to SoCal five years ago, I've been through four doctors.

First: Dr. "Meh"

She was actually okay, but the meds she prescribed did very little.
She then moved far away so I couldn't continue seeing her. (I don't think she moved because of me....)

Second: Dr. Bat-S*** Crazy

* Dominated the conversation during our first meeting by describing his conspiracy theory about 9/11.

* At the second meeting tried to sell me on a pyramid scheme for mangosteen juice.

[I can't make this stuff up, folks.]

Didn't go back after that.

Third: Dr. I Don't Give a Damn

* Regaled me with tales of the kids he worked with in juvenile hall and how he would tell them that he didn't care if they cooperated, that he'd get paid either way.

* Referred to a lot of his patients as "ghetto kids."

* When I told him the Seroquel made me sleep for 14 hours, he didn't seem concerned and told me that I would just have to learn to adjust.

Didn't go back after that.

Fourth: Dr. Hypocratic Oathless

* Upon first meeting me told me I was eligible for this amazing, earth-shattering new brain study that could pinpoint exactly what medication I would need.

It was his own study. (Color me surprised.)

I took the preliminary test and somehow didn't qualify. He didn't really take much interest in me after that.

* Not once did he remember my name and never bothered to bring my chart in with him. He would have to ask my name every time he wrote a prescription for me.

* Once I Googled his name because I left my appointment book at home and couldn't remember the address or name of the building and needed the info for insurance. Found out he had a sexual misconduct charge brought against him.

Definitely didn't go back after that.

It's a wonder I haven't come through this worse than when I started.

Has anyone else had this crazy of an experience with doctors? Or is it just me?
(Please tell me it's not just me.)

Actually, I know I'm not the only one, because Agusten Burrows wrote the book, Running With Scissors, a memoir chronicling his life when he went to live with his mother's psychiatrist. Now that's a scary read.

(source)

2011-02-03T06:32:00.001-08:00

(image)

Came across this today and thought it was pretty funny. Although I think my brain's caption would read "utter [chaos]."

Happy Groundhog Day

2011-02-02T06:37:00.001-08:00

Or Happy Groad Hogs Day as the case may be:

(Cake Wrecks, natch.)

Both Punxsutawney Phil

and Staten Island Chuck

(who knew?)

say it's an early end to winter. I've never understood why having a sunny day indicates more winter and a gloomy day means Spring's around the corner.

Come to think of it, I've never understood why people look to a fat rodent to predict the weather anyway. It must be because of all that snow the East gets this time of year. They go stir crazy from staying inside all day and are desperate for anyone or anything to tell them it's going to end soon.

At least it makes for a funny movie.

Hey, I just remembered that Bill Murray's been in a close encounter with a groundhog before!

(image)

Maybe those of us who don't need to worry about snow or six more weeks of winter should just start wishing each other a Happy Bill Murray day.

Monday Musings; Tuesday Edition

2011-02-01T13:16:00.001-08:00

Looking back on January I see that I didn't do as badly on my organizing goals as I thought I would. I completed 16 of the 21 days of organizing challenges at a bowl full of lemons, and I'm still working on number 17: the mail. The reason this one is taking so long is because it's evolved into an upheaval of my entire filing system.

The last four challenges were keepsakes, the master closet, photos, and then one of our choice. While the master closet might not take too long, the other specific challenges will take a while, certainly longer than one day. But I have to say, I'm impressed that I got so far. Toni's doing weekly challenges now, which I think are more my speed. This week's is to make a home management binder, which I've tried in the past and failed miserably. I think binders aren't my thang. I do still plan on checking in on her challenges weekly, to see what I am capable of doing.

This weekend was full of yard work. Well, not for me. I got to stay indoors and watch from the window. All the manly men went out and turned the soil with manly tools. [Insert a "Tim the Tool Man" Taylor gorilla grunt.]

Lots of backbreaking work.

But there's always time to spread the love.

As for me, I was sent in a downward spiral of depression that I still haven't found my way out of. I usually try to pull myself out of a pit like this by rationalizing with myself, like saying, "Hey, at least you have a job, a roof over your head, and enough food to eat. And it's not like you have to wrestle man-eating sharks or anything." The crazy thing is that depression is one of those dementias that makes you think, "I'd rather be wrestling a man-eating shark than dealing with this. At least then I'd be living in the moment." [I'm sure Ralph's thinking, "Wanna live in the moment? Get one of those pick axes and help me break up some of these dirt clods."]

I know. It sounds crazy. It is. The fog is starting to lift, though, and hopefully I'll be back in the swing of things soon. Until then I just have to fight the urge to pull the covers over my head and hibernate for a few weeks.

sorry. editors' humor

So Cool: Lego My Movie!

2011-01-30T02:00:00.000-08:00

How cool is this! A man named Alex Eylar recreated famous film scenes with his collection of over 30,000 Legos.

James Bond

The shower scene from Psycho

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

He includes other memorable scenes from The Exorcist, Silence of the Lambs, Harry Potter, and Twilight among others.

One of my personal faves?

Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark

Make Sure to Match Your Pets to Your Drapes BEFORE You Bring Them Home

2011-01-29T02:00:00.000-08:00

A woman in the UK recently returned a rescue dog because he clashed with her curtains.

The "Clasher"

I'm glad blue is one of my favorite colors.

My little boy Blue

Actually I don't care if he was florescent green with purple polka dots, who could resist that smile?

Day #16 ~ The Fridge

2011-01-28T13:07:00.001-08:00

I had this done a while ago, but just hadn't had the time to post it. The rest of the challenges, as of now, are still undone. I am working on the mail station, which is actually turning into organizing all my files, which might take another two decades. So yeah, progress has slowed a bit.

It was definitely time to clean and organize the fridge. There were Kool Aid spills, unidentifiable lumps in Tupperware containers, and lots of bags and bottles holding things like half a tortilla or two drops of ketchup taking up valuable space.

Here's the before, complete with yet another one of the furry critters helping me "clean." This one lives for food, even if it's dried and stuck to the bottom of the fridge.

Here's the door; I think 90% of the bottles had less than one serving left in them.

One of the teens-in-residence decided to reenact a Sasquatch sighting behind the fridge door. I didn't even notice him until I pulled up the pics on the computer.

I cleared the shelves one at a time (didn't want to have all the food out on the counter at once) and thoroughly cleaned them, along with the sides, bottom, and inside the door. I don't even want to know what half the stuff was that I wiped off the surfaces in there.

I put things like cookies (which we have to keep in the fridge cause of ants) in Tupperware that made it possible to reach in a grab a few without simultaneously spreading another fine layer of crumbs on the shelf.

I took fruits and veggies out of their plastic bags so they're more accessible and less likely to turn into gray, liquidy, lumps.

I threw out a lot of the bottles, random candy, and other food that was being ~~forgotten~~ "saved." This gave me a lot more room, and made it look infinitely better.

Unfortunately I think this is going to have to be a weekly project, as the other Sasquatches in the house don't have "keep fridge clean" as their highest priority. But it does sure look purdy right now!

I'm a Marilyn

2011-01-26T11:57:00.001-08:00

Not in the looks department, obviously. But in temperament it seems pretty right on. [except for confronting danger bravely...]

These are the results of the oh-so-scientific Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz:

You Are a Marilyn!

You are a Marilyn -- "I am affectionate and skeptical."

Marilyns are responsible, trustworthy, and value loyalty to family, friends, groups, and causes. Their personalities range broadly from reserved and timid to outspoken and confrontational.

How to Get Along with Me

* Be direct and clear

* Listen to me carefully

* Don't judge me for my anxiety

* Work things through with me

* Reassure me that everything is OK between us

* Laugh and make jokes with me

* Gently push me toward new experiences

* Try not to overreact to my overreacting.

What I Like About Being a Marilyn

* being committed and faithful to family and friends

* being responsible and hardworking

* being compassionate toward others

* having intellect and wit

* being a nonconformist

* confronting danger bravely

* being direct and assertive

What's Hard About Being a Marilyn

* the constant push and pull involved in trying to make up my mind

* procrastinating because of fear of failure; having little confidence in myself

* fearing being abandoned or taken advantage of

* exhausting myself by worrying and scanning for danger

* wishing I had a rule book at work so I could do everything right

* being too critical of myself when I haven't lived up to my expectations

Marilyns as Children Often

* are friendly, likable, and dependable, and/or sarcastic, bossy, and stubborn

* are anxious and hypervigilant; anticipate danger

* form a team of "us against them" with a best friend or parent

* look to groups or authorities to protect them and/or question authority and rebel

* are neglected or abused, come from unpredictable or alcoholic families, and/or take on the fearfulness of an overly anxious parent

Marilyns as Parents

* are often loving, nurturing, and have a strong sense of duty

* are sometimes reluctant to give their children independence

* worry more than most that their children will get hurt

* sometimes have trouble saying no and setting boundaries

Wanna try for yourself?

Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz at HelloQuizzy

Ten on Tuesday ~ What Gets Me Through the Day

2011-01-25T10:01:00.000-08:00

Ten things (people are a whole different post) that get me through each day, for which I am forever grateful.

In order that they appear:

My Reliable Alarm Clock
It's never failed me or had an off day. [Knock wood.]
I hate it at 3:30 AM but recognize it as a necessary evil.
It's just doing its job.

Hot water/shower
When I lived in Colombia, my hot-water tank was about the size of a gallon of milk.

Most people there take cold showers.

Voluntarily.

One time I called the maintenance guy to look at it because it wasn't working. He asked incredulously, "You want hot water?"

Yes. Yes I do.

Coffee

I don't care if it's instant, comes out of a vending machine, or is three days old. (Most of the time I drink the cheapest instant kind the grocery store carries.) I need it for the caffeine and the other drivers on I-10 at 4:30 AM thank me.

My 1994 Toyota Camry
She's a workhorse, that one. Pushing 180,000 miles and still drives 120 miles a day without rattling. I am so thankful for a car with good gas mileage that gets me to and from work each day.

And speaking of...

My Mechanic
(Okay, so I don't have to see him everyday. Thank God.)
But he deserves honorable mention because he is honest, kind, and makes sure I'm driving a safe car.
Worth his weight in gold.

My Computer
(work and home)
Pretty self explanatory.
For the most part we can't get by without them nowadays.
Most of my work is done on computer.

A Working Refrigerator
We've had many instances with the opposite, so I am thankful that this one is still going strong.

And while I'm at it:

A Working Stove
As much as cooking is the bane of my existence, I do appreciate the fact that I have the tools to make healthy meals for my family.

Lotion
This can actually be inserted in about 10 different places on this list.
Dry itchy skin = obsessed, dysfunctional Heather.

Trazodone
(antidepressant to help me sleep)
At this point in my life, my insomnia still rages and trazodone comes to the rescue. I am weaning myself off of it, but for now this is what works.
I also like that it's not a typical "sleeping pill" so I don't wake up all groggy.
No sleep = zombie-like, dysfunctional Heather

My Warm Bed
It beckons me each night and lets me rest my weary body upon it.
I really try not to take this for granted.

It's the little things, ya know?

What gets you through your day?

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Day #14 ~ Under the Bathroom Sink

2011-01-19T12:05:00.000-08:00

Today the challenge is actually over and I'm only on Day #14. (Well, I actually finished Day #15 and 16, and I'm part way through 17, but I'm slow with posting.)

It's not that I've lost steam, it's just that many of the remaining challenges take more than just an hour to complete (which is pretty much the only amount of free time I have each weekday).

I am going to try and complete them by January 31st, though. That's the official catch-up date.

So.

There are three bathrooms to choose from, but the master bathroom was by far the worst, so I tackled that.

Left side:

The usual crap.

Right side:

The garbage bag is left over from when Ralph broke his leg and had to tape up his cast every time he got in the shower.

I didn't realize I fit that much crap under there.

Notice the handy dandy coat hanger that we use for getting my insane amount of hair out of the drain.

I purged a bunch of stuff and found some containers I had around the house to corral the leftover ~~crap~~ necessities.

So far so good. And since I've purged a lot of cleaners, etc., from under the kitchen sink and other places, I don't think we'll see them creep into this one.

Unless they've been breeding and I didn't eradicate the babies.